There are days when I just have no will left to study. I've taken a few hours off, had a coffee, talked with friends, exercised, kept a positive attitude, and most importantly slept well, but I sit down at a table with hundreds of pages of work to review and my mind will be less compliant than a rock. The most prominent enemy in med school is outward, in the challenge of countless theoretical and practical examinations. Every lecture is not just a preparation for eventual practice, but first a tome that must be memorized and scrutinized to the smallest detail.
However, the enemy that lies within is one I've gotten to know well here. The longer I stay here, the more I view my mind/brain as a separate entity from my self. It is a machine, a calculator that can retain information, crunch it, and spit out results, but its tempermental as hell and needs more fine tuning than an Italian car. I spend a good chunk of my day just controlling the conditions that will allow me to work through the tasks of the day. Yesterday, I had everything necessary except specific goals, and as a result I just half-heartedly went through my notes and questions, only recognizing later how inefficient my progress was. Today, I started by going through a hundred practice questions, just to identify my weak subjects, and plan on addressing the individual points I've identified thus far.
Good hunting, fellow students of life!
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